James: You’ve not broken your fingers, have you? Too quiet.
She’d done it again. Handled him badly, rudely. She replayed it over and over—feeling worse every time. But still she told herself it was the right thing to have done. If she’d carried on the way she was, she’d have walked off a cliff with him if he’d asked her to.
She had to stay on her own track—see the sights she’d wanted to see for so long. Go to study her post-grad qualification somewhere interesting… be herself.
Levi might be all about R&R now, but he wouldn’t be aimless for long. He’d go full tilt into some new enterprise soon and if she was with him, she’d be diving in too. She’d lose herself and her own ambition along the way until she re-emerged from the dream one day and found resentment in its place.
So she’d get over this loneliness. She’d made the right choice.
Except she wished he was beside her, wished he was there so she could tell him about the mosaic she was admiring and the myth it represented and listen to him make some joke or go off on some divergent, fascinating topic.
She wanted to share it with him. She wanted to share everything with him.
So much for thinking that having a little light sex wasn’t going to leave her aching for so much more.
But for once she was sticking to her game plan and she was damn well going to enjoy it.
For the most part, she did. How could anyone not enjoy a month exploring Greece and her history? She met people, laughed with other travellers. But inside? She still wished Levi was with her so she could turn and tell him something, so she could ask about the way he saw it, so she could curl close and feel that effortless freedom that she’d only ever felt with him.
And as time wore on, doubt grew. The words he’d thrown at her circled in her head. Was she being cowardly? Was she just trying to prove her “Wolfe” credentials? Was she taking the easy way out and avoiding something because it threatened to overwhelm her? Was being overwhelmed so very bad?
What was overwhelming now, was the ache in her heart.
It was expanding, not contracting. This wasn’t how ‘holiday flings’ were supposed to be—they should leave warm memories not gaping holes.
You don’t even want to try.
She winced as she acknowledged the truth of his accusation. She’d been so wrong—she did want to try. She wanted that more than anything. She was such an idiot because now she’d stopped to think, she knew Levi had done nothing but be supportive. He’d let her take the lead—and not just in bed. He was absolutely the guy she needed—he listened, laughed, was so easy to love.
But there was no going back now. She was alone at Athens airport and he’d be sailing off into the sunset.